Motherhood is awesome. It really is. There is no greater satisfaction than seeing my little kids smile at me or reach for me for comfort. I love being H and N’s momma and wouldn’t change it for the world. Buuuttttttttt……………
Motherhood is hard. Seriously, not an easy thing. Parenthood is no place for wussies. Motherhood is no place for anyone who’s mental and physical endurance is anything less than that of Chuck Norris.
It seems to me in my relatively short time of joining the league of motherhood that BALANCE just might be the key.
Problem is, before we moved to Europe, I couldn’t seem to find that balance anywhere. I taught kindergarten full-time and somewhere in between work and lesson planing, I try to give H and N the attention they needed, spend time with my husband, cook, clean, and try to have at least 5 minutes of me time. That’s hard to fit in a 24-hour window.
I love spending time with H and N. I love spending time with Del. And I especially love the time we all spend together. But I noticed after Harper’s birth, and then our second baby N’s birth, it was so much easier to forget about myself. I would give it all to H and N and Del, and by the end of the day, I would crash in the worst mood. My little hobbies and interests didn’t matter anymore. I had a new hobby and a new interest in the kids, right? Not necessarily… It doesn’t count that way.
While my kids are my new (and favorite!) interest, I realize that letting go of the ‘old’ me wasn’t good for any of us. While I was wrapping myself in momma and wife duties, I was forgetting about myself. Don’t get me wrong, my first and most exciting roles are being that of a wife and mom. But, I had 23 years of ‘me’ before I was wife, and 24 years before I was a mom. I think it’s important that I don’t just throw ‘me’ away.
So in an effort to achieve some sort of balance with my life, I decided to not work while we are living in Europe. It’s not that I cant find a job, its my choice to stay home to find balance. I want to set aside an hour or so here and there to enjoy ‘me’.
I could read a book like the old days. I could take a walk without a time frame of when I needed to turn around. I could do the laundry without having to worry about being in bed at a certain hour. I might organize my closet or clean out the junk drawer. Heck, clean the baseboards! (As weird as that sounds, I actually love to clean. My house is spotless lol!)
Regardless, I believe a little ‘me’ time every now and then is essential and necessary for all parents. Which is why, today, when the kids go to nap time, rather than napping the day away, I am choosing to read my crime book and then do the dishes… Bow-chicka-wow-wow.
Ciao,